I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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