dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
