Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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