Midget sex pt 2 tonight
is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
Randomize
