dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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