Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
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