No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
