just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
