Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
