It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Randomize
