One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
