he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize