i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
