This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Randomize
