i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
FUCK WHALES
Randomize
