turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
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