first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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