You surviving the open bar?
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I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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