I'm really into asian looking animals
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
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