idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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