arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
