after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Randomize
