champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
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