Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize
