Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
How's work?
Spinning.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Randomize
