I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Randomize
