Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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