i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
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