i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
