I need help removing her.
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
