Can Purell be used as lube?
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Randomize
