Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Randomize
