The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
I am spending my child support on dildos
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
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