Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
They should really pass out barf bags in church
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Randomize
