How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Randomize
