yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
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