seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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