He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
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