Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
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