A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Randomize
