I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
Randomize
