I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Randomize
