he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Randomize