he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Randomize
