WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
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