All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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