idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
My life is pants optional.
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