8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
The dick lei will go down in squad history
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
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