Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
Randomize
