it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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